Archive for July, 2011

Posted in Uncategorized on July 25, 2011 by ajhayes2


Posted in Uncategorized on July 22, 2011 by ajhayes2

In the day I bend to my work. Sometimes raking the fallen leaves that scatter across the gold-green meadows that border the forest. Sometimes painting the white washed, wooden fences of the great estate. There are many chores to do in such a fine place as this. I work and watch every day as the maidens come forth, in their exquisite gowns with their tiaras of platinum and gold sitting atop their carefully coiffured tresses, to play with the Unicorns.

The great, rainbow-colored beasts kneel and touch their chalk-white horns to the green grass in tribute to the roses of virtue and virginity that are the maidens. The maids shyly, slyly, glance at each other from beneath lowered lashes and pet the shining horns knowing that only the purest of the pure may touch a Unicorn’s horn. Then, in the long, late afternoon shadows, they troop back into the castle.

They never look at me, of course. I am merely the hired girl of the estate. Plain and possessed of only the simplest garments of homespun wool and cheapest cotton. With rough hands and smelling of sweat, I am less than nothing in their eyes.

But, when the dark comes and the moon rises to sail the depths of the sky, the forests rustle softly and the great beasts come to me. Their quiet nickering and the scent of their lust surrounds me as I lie down and open to them and am transported to the place where only they can take me.

Sometimes, not often, I look at the sleeping castle, think of the maids within and laugh.


Posted in Uncategorized on July 21, 2011 by ajhayes2

There’s a place on Highway 1 in California where you can look straight down a hundred feet on a small cove surrounded by jagged black lava rock walls and held fast at its mouth by submerged reefs. As you look down on the sea you can actually see the roiling evidence of the five or six currents that meet there. They look like several separate snakes weaving their way around, past and through each other. They come together and draw apart and sometimes weave their own way for a bit. You can track their individual trails by bits of seaweed caught in their grip or bottom sand that makes coppery gold patterns as it swirls in the passage of the water. Whatever their paths and crossings and seeming confusions of purpose, at last they join and crash on the small sandy beach and wipe it white and pristine.

Two Way Split is like that place. Its multiple, diverse characters circle and swirl over, under, around, and through each other; seeming to go in all different directions at once. In the end though, they come together and crash onto the sandy beach and wipe it clean and pure and just the way it ought to be.

All that arty bleep aside, In Two Way Split, Mr. Allan Guthrie with a maniacal laugh, knocks your derby clear off your head, sends it flying with the wind and announces that people, events and even life itself always come down to the jagged edge of a two way split. Buckle your chin strap and hang on, troops. You’re in for a RIDE!

Scott Chase Has A Dilemma – A Review

Posted in Uncategorized on July 5, 2011 by ajhayes2

Scott Chase has a dilemma. He’s written a collection of short stories called The Backseat Virgin that depict the dark side of the Florida Dream with a sharp eye for the details that you might not want your grandparents to know about the Sunshine State (or maybe you do want them to know if they haven’t retired there yet or — if they already have retired there — don’t tell them and they probably won’t go out and buy three pit bulls and a sawed off shotgun and spend the rest of their lives jumping at sharp noises or sudden shadows. Ignorance, as they say, is bliss.)

His dilemma is that, while the first four stories in this collection are crisp and photographic in their depictions of hurricanes, dope smuggling infants, hit men/enforcers, mob bosses, people just trying to get by and stay alive, private eyes, bent cops, kinda bent cops, really dumb crooks and some really smart crooks — all of whom lead up to and are included in, the final story, The Backseat Virgin. After you finish the collection, you say, PHEW! What a Ride. Then you think, Hey! I want more of these guys.

And that’s the problem. Scott and I talked about it. See, we both know that the stories stand alone quite nicely but — and here’s the dilemma part — Scott would have to write a really Big Ass Novel to encompass what he’s built here and take it where it wants to go.

The nice part of this problem is, he could walk away right now and know that he’s written a pretty damn good collection of Florida Noir tales and let it go at that . . . but he also knows he damn well should write the BAN.

I know this is preying on his mind now. And he’s cussing all of us who want the BAN on our bookshelves or in our Kindles, right freakin’ now! And he knows he will write the Big Ass Novel because, well, what the hell . . . it’s money and his fans want it and he’s getting tormented to write it and, well, it’s money.

You can find the collection here:

And that’s probably where the Big Ass Novel will be found when he writes it also.